we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Randomize