Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize