I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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