8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
