my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
