So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
