i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
jump out the window naked night went bad
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