Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
