Fine. I'll sleep in my office
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
