How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
