i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
