I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
