She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize