the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
