i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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