hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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