What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
The police scanner is talking about you again....
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
