Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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