At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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