Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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