So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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