from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
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