My hand turned me down
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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