thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
