wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
We are all done wearing pants today
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
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