sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Vodka?
Forever.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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