I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize