I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
