Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
