So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
