apparently the secret to your success is patron
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Randomize
