quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
