so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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