So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize