Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
