Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
