You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
