Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Randomize
