Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I want to be your penis for a week.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
