Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
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