the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
