Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
A bitchslap is in order.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
