on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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