she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Dick very happy bro
Randomize
