did you get engaged???
I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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