Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Randomize
