another moral hangover. fuck.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
