He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
