found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Randomize