your thong is hanging out like whoa
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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