We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
