White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
